Lately I've been finding I dont spend a lot of time with Max.  He has mastered the art of Independent Play.  For the most part of last week I carried this tremendous, crippling guilt because of it.

Why has Max mastered Independent Play?  Because I am trying to keep up with all my responsibilities that usually or can be split between a two parent household - you know cooking, cleaning, laundry, bills, etc. 

Each weekend I go into the weekend purposely making no plans so that I can spend quality time with Max, and each weekend, on Sunday nights as I rock him to sleep my heart sinks to my stomach and I feel bad because I didnt get to spend too much time with him. 

(of course all of this could be solved by me not doing the cleaning, cooking, laundry and we can live like slobs but be deliriously happy)

Today I tried to spend some time with Max.  It doesnt help when he's being the typical toddler/two year old.  We went to the park this morning, stopped at the grocery store where he got to use the kiddie cart and walk through the store (where he normally sits in the big cart).  After nap, I sat him on my bed, taught him how to change the dvd's in the computer and I folded clothes while he 'watched' all of his videos.  Then we colored and played with all my scrapbooking supplies.

This is the result of that 30 minute activity:

I had asked my sister Sharon earlier in the week if this guilt subsides, she said eventually it does.  It gets worse before it gets better. 

I just hope Max doesnt hate me, and will want to spend time with me after I end my pity/guilt party.

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A mom friend, Cristina, gave me a suggestion earlier this week about doing things after Max goes to bed.  Not sure why I didnt think of it myself or two years ago, but once I start getting my energy back after #2, I might have to give this a try.  Common sense, right??  Duh, Melissa.