My view, understanding and love for my body has changed. 

Before Max, I would abuse my body by not eating, making poor food choices, having little to no nutrition.  I would exercise compulsively because I thought I was 'fat' as defined by society.  I would do all the previously mentioned and then some, just to squeeze into size eight jeans.  Sure, it did wonders on my psyche, but my heart? my blood pressure?  my cholesterol?  Um, probably not so great. 

Now I sit here, having given birth to another human being and having to shop for new clothes, I am finding that I am not so hard on myself because I cant fit into size eight pants.  I am now conscious of what I eat, making sure I get proper nutrition so I can be healthy for Max.  I have stretch marks on my stomach but I am not disgusted by them nor am I ready for them to go away.  (I know they never will, but I want them to take their time shrinking)  Why?  Because its a gentle reminder of what my body did and can do.  I am in awe over the fact that Max is a result of my body.  He started out as just a bunch of cells, and now he's in the next room sleeping in his crib. 

There is a line in the movie Miss Congeniality 2, at the end where Gracie visits a classroom of a grade school fan, and says this to the class, '... the strength to hold fast to your beliefs... while society's forcing you to conform to some barbie doll image, know what I'm saying?'

This is a great  message to everyone, in regards to self-esteem and image.  Dont let what the tags say, what peers say, about how you should look, what size is beautiful.  Everyone is beautiful in their own right.  This message has finally made it through to me. 

I look at my body now and knowing what it can do, the miracle it can provide and I find that I love it just the way it is, stretch marks, hanging uterus and all.  I've never been this comfortable in my own skin.  Its such a great feeling.  So much better than knowing what the tag says.